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Ten Things you Should Know about Playing Online Poker
- Someone always calls. I can’t tell you how many times I have had someone call a huge bet when I was ahead in the hand… only to catch the cards (plural) they needed in order to win. It’s a sick feeling that you just have to get used to. Not going on tilt after hands like this is what separates the winners from losers.
- Most online poker players are losing players. I forgot where I read it, (pokerlistings?) but it said that the guy who was the 100th best online poker player in the world only made 100k last year. The odds of most people at the table being truly good players are slim. Also keep in mind that it takes extraordinary effort/skill to be a consistent winner.
- You can’t see your opponent’s hole cards. Sure spend the $20 for the bogus software that claims it can do this for you. It’s bullshit. Like anyone would sell it for $20 if it worked. If I had a dollar for everyone who found this site for searching some kind of phrase like “see hold cards pokerstars” on Google, I would donking off chips at Full Tilt at an alarming rate. Then again maybe I already am?
- You don’t need rakeback unless you play A LOT. Casual players won’t really get enough money to really help their bankroll. If you play a few hours a day, everyday, then you would benefit from rakeback.
- Girls are intimidating. Make your poker screen name a girls name and choose the sexy avatar. Watch people get all choked up in heads up matches. When they start trash talking you, say something like, “That’s no way to speak to a lady”. Then laugh while they apologize and dump their stack.
- Playing while multitasking is a recipe for disaster. I can’t remember a time where I have been watching TV, chatting on messenger, talking on the phone, and playing poker where I actually won any money.
- Playing drunk is fun, but dumb. A good buddy of mine got so hammered one night that he decided to play some 5/10 NL on Full Tilt. He was up about $15,000 before calling it a night. Pretty badass huh? That was until he woke up and checked his account to see all the money was gone… turns out he was playing for play money but was too wasted to realize it. Moral to the story, just go to bed when you get home from the bar.
- People like to talk. Ever played a table where everyone seems to know each other? That’s probably because they do. The truth is, however, they like to sit in the chat box and shoot the shit about all their bad beats and why they should be up instead of down because it makes them feel cool. Just turn off the chat box, ignore the BS, and focus on the game.
- Ace King is a drawing hand. I know… I know. In online poker most players assume their AK is the nuts straight from the start. Don’t be a sucker, and don’t get owned because you felt like a champ with your AK off suit. Know the rank of starting hands, and don’t overplay yours… unless you like looking foolish and losing money.
- No one cares about your most recent bad beat. It’s kind of funny how many people tell me their bad beat stories as if I don’t know how it’s going to end halfway through it. If you must, post it in a forum’s bad beat section and talk it out with some other people who have suffered a recent bad beat. Hopefully that helps you get over it.
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